Challenges

So I was released from my calling today. I knew it was coming, but I wasn't sure how I felt about it. Then as I was walking down the hall, several people commented on how I must be relieved and how I could go to grown up class now. I just smiled and agreed and went to class like always.

But all afternoon I have been thinking about it, and the truth is that I am not as relieved as everyone seems to think I should be.

First of all, I think most people are secretly glad they didn't have my calling. Their loss. Working with the kids every week can be frustrating, but it also way more fun than any other calling I have had. And while it is challenging to get and keep the attention of 50 kids every week, it is also true that they are more forgiving if you get it wrong once in awhile. And I always think if you can explain the gospel so a five year old gets it, you are doing OK.

That's just part of the story. The other reason I am not as relieved as expected is because I know what is coming. Or I don't know. That is, I know that there is another calling in store for me. I don't have enough details yet to know if I am excited about it or not. What I know for sure is that every calling is an opportunity to get out of your comfort zone and be challenged to learn and grow. The good news is that my possible new calling has the potential to be what I make of it.

The bad news is that I have a sneaking suspicion that the real reason I am being freed up from my calling with the kids is to prepare myself for B's move from Primary to YM. Gotta be honest, I am pretty sure I am not ready for that challenge. The thought of sitting in class and making small talk with old ladies looks good compared to trying to have an adult conversation with the budding adolescent that is now my son.

Off and Running

I thought I was doing really well. I came back from vacation with all sorts of energy and resolve and plans, and I was hanging in there. Then some stuff happened, and I am suddenly feeling overwhelmed and like I need another vacation. I don't think it's any one thing, just a combination of things, none of which I have time to write about right now. I am just going to make bullet points, and try to come back to them later.

• cat is gone, dog won't leave - she howls all night long, making sleep impossible
• crazy busy at work, which is a good thing
• crazy busy at church, which is supposed to be good but is stressing me out
• list of personal tasks/errands grows faster than I can find time to get them done
• I have a potential writing gig which is very cool, but frustrating that I can't dedicate more time to it right now
• enthusiasm for the gift basket project is dwindling, but I am sort of committed to it now
• a member of my TM group just passed away very suddenly

I keep thinking if I can just get through January and February, everything always looks better in the spring. If I can maneuver a day off for opening day at the races, that might work OK too :)

Survival

Christmas was mostly great. We made it in three long days and had a great time while we were there. We saw family, took B skiing, played a lot of pool while the kids played in the snow, saw wild life (including mountain lion tracks) and had no mishaps. We returned home and spent New Year's Eve day with L's family, which included more cool gifts, shopping and dumpster diving, and of course the annual bird drop. To summarize, I survived a cross-country road trip with my family, skiing, and the second annual aflockalypse, as well as the first day back at work.

I hope the cat was as lucky. We left her with grandma while we were gone, and no one has seen her since day three.