I Believe

Long story short, but I was thinking about writing my own "I Believe" statement. I got distracted and could only think of this:

 Kevin Costner (Crash Davis): Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

Maybe I'll get around to the rest of my statement eventually. So far I have a pretty firm belief in the importance of good grammar and that there is no such thing as too much garlic. Until then, there are worse things to be thinking of on this random Friday in April than Kevin Costner ; )

Suck What?

So Hillary had her brain surgery today. The prognosis is good - the tumor was larger than they thought, but they are confident they got all of it, and that it is not cancerous. Very glad to hear it, and hope that her recovery goes well. I was really worried about her and her family.

On a lighter note, I got a bit of a laugh today. This blog has an analytical tool, which I never use because I have only ever given the URL to three people, who I am pretty sure haven't been around in forever. But occasionally I am prompted to check it and lo and behold, I had a visitor over the weekend. I used the tool to figure out how they came to land on my blog. Apparently, some fetishist was looking up Asian*girl*smashing*crawdads*with*stilettos, and my page came up. They apparently didn't find what they were looking for, and moved on.

Must not have seen this:

WTF

Spent last night and so far today trying to sort out weekend plans. In the middle of it all, another random text that has me out of sorts. Topped off by a mutiny in the making. Oh yeah, the next two days are gonna suck too.

But this is funny, in a sad and ironic kind of way.

The Debut

Finally, B's movie debut has been posted. His group wrote, storyboarded, filmed and edited this in just 3 and a half days. Awesome job!

WHEW!

Just spent the entire morning watching the coverage of the release of the West Memphis 3 (http://wm3.org/). Now everything feels kind of anticlimactic. Going to lunch, then maybe come back and try to get some work done before heading home for a busy weekend.

Best of Costner

1: Am I special? 2: Well, if you can remove the sexual overtones and add a golf theme, then Romeo, I am your Juliet.

You tell me which are my better moments and I will try to duplicate them.

I believe in the soul. The cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curveball, high-fiber, good Scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there oughta be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve, and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. Good night.

I Can "Support" This

Ha ha - July 9th is National No Bra Day. So what that this is a lame non-event created for Facebook - it just means every day is a holiday for some of us LOL

Yikes!

I thought I saw a vampire in the restroom at work today. She had dark hair, severely pulled back to show off her pale skin and red lips. I looked away before she flashed her teeth we could make eye contact and saw that she was wearing these:

In retrospect, she probably was less of a vampire than just another southern soul wishing so desperately for spring that she broke out the footwear a bit early and ended up looking like this:

Getting a Freak On

Interesting day. Only got some of my project accomplished, mainly because I got distracted first thing. It has been forever since I logged in to chat, but I was apparently visible and got a hello from a guy I used to chat with sometimes. We kept each other company for a bit while we were both alone. It was an experience, but not one I'll soon repeat. Suffice to say that it was both satisfying and not satisfying, and that no matter how screwed up I think I am, there is always someone more screwed up if you look in the wrong right places.

Move On

Who really cares if the president wears flip flops? He was f***ing born in Hawaii, you crazy birthers.

Don Tyson dies. Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and Willie Nelson are among the honorary pallbearers.

In an effort to get Lady Antebellum out of my head (why is that song suddenly all over the radio again?), I ended up listening to this song all day:

Blackbirds, Updated

Ha ha ha. I played hooky from work today to go to Memphis. Even people there were asking about the bird incident, as was a friend from OK. The CNN van was still in town this evening, so when I got home I looked to see if there was anything new to report.

Long story short, they still think it was some kind of trauma as a result of the birds being startled by fireworks and cannon fire. They went on to say that some birds had been sent to another lab for additional testing,but they thought they could rule out poisoning, as well as the weather.

I had to read it twice though. I find the trauma explanation as reasonable as the weather explanation, but I am still cracking up that they mentioned cannon fire and no one seemed to think that part was odd at all. People were quoted as saying it was unlike anything they had ever seen before, possibly a sign of the end times, and what not, but not a single person (besides me?) thought the fact that someone had shot off a freaking cannon was strange.

Blackbirds

The most interesting thing to happen so far this year:

BEEBE, AR  – Ringing in the New Year took on a different meaning for the citizens of Beebe. Beginning at around 11:30pm, enforcement officers with Arkansas Game and Fish Commission began getting reports of dead black birds falling from the sky in the city limits of Beebe.

Dick Baxter with the Game and Fish Commission estimates that 2000-2500 birds fell out of the sky over the city. Most of the birds were dead, but some were still alive when officers arrived. Three different types of blackbirds fell over a one-mile area in the city.

AGFC wildlife officer Robby King responded to the reports and found hundreds of birds.

“Shortly after I arrived there were still birds falling from the sky,” King said.

King collected about 65 dead birds that will be sent to the Arkansas Livestock and Poultry Commission lab and the National Wildlife Health Center lab in Madison, Wis.

The AGFC has flown over the area to gauge the scope of the event. There were no other birds found outside of the initial area.

AGFC ornithologist Karen Rowe said that strange events similar to this one have occurred a number of times around the world.

“Test results usually were inconclusive, but the birds showed physical trauma and that the flock could have been hit by lightning or high-altitude hail,” Rowe said.

Another scenario may have been that New Year’s Eve revelers shooting off fireworks in the area may have startled the birds from their roost. The birds may have died from stress.

Rowe said that it didn’t appear as though the birds died of any poisoning or other event.

“Since it only involved a flock of blackbirds and only involved them falling out of the sky it is unlikely they were poisoned, but a necropsy is the only way to determine if the birds died from trauma or toxin,” she said.

Testing will begin on Monday.

The City of Beebe has hired U.S. Environmental Services to begin the cleanup and dispose of the dead birds. The environmental firm will go door-to-door to pick up the birds that are still in yards and on roof tops. Residents are urged not to touch the birds without wearing rubber gloves.

Holy @*%#

I think I felt sorry for Brett Favre today. I don't not like him, he has just never been my favorite player. He has always been fun to watch though, for his sheer love of the game. You can always tell when he is having fun. Even when he gets intercepted or takes a hit, he has that "aw, shucks, it was worth a try" grin on his face when he gets up. Now, he gets up more slowly and sometimes appears to be trying to figure out where he is. Yeah dude, you're still playing football.

Until today, I didn't feel real bad for him. I figured he sort of brought it on himself, staying in the game as long as he has. He has to know that every defensive player is hoping to be the guy who took him out of the game with a clean, legal play. Like most exceptional athletes, he wants to end his career at his best, on his terms. Like most athletes, he has committed to the team and the season and the fans doesn't want to let anyone down. Those are admirable traits, but the truth is that he is letting people, or at least this person, down.

He is not fun to watch anymore, because he most certainly does not look like he is having fun at all. More and more, he looks like the pervy old guy who hangs around looking for a school yard game of smear the queer, only those kids are wise to him.

Me, Me, Me

The purpose of this blog was originally to be an outlet for all of the random junk that clutters up my mind: memories or reflections that don't mean anything to other people, things I wish I had said but didn't, strange thoughts that don't exactly lend themselves to conversation, and so on. I kept it private partly because I didn't imagine anyone else being interested, and partly because I liked the idea of being able to express things someplace when no other place seemed right.

Along the way I realized that what is missing is the person or persons who would be interested in my rambling. Some one who didn't already know my every quirk and flaw, someone who was interested in getting to know me better, another person who shared my curiosity about the world, had my sarcastic sense of humor, understood my frustration with life sometimes, or otherwise had something in common with me.

Also along the way I have picked up a couple of occasional readers that I know of, and shared the blog link with a few others. At the same time, blogger added the new page feature. So, in an effort not to have to explain everything to people, I am practicing my blog design skills by adding a page. The page is still just a collection of random thoughts, but they are things that might be helpful to know before jumping into the rest of the blog.

Like a Period

Not that I am keeping track exactly. Just that every time I forget to anticipate it, there it is.

That's Just Wrong

Our neighbor's 14 year-old daughter had her baby. She is home, but the baby is in the ICU. It was born five weeks, or five years, too soon, depending on how you look at it.

California Lemonade

You will need:
1 bottle of cheap white wine
3-4 lemons
1/4 cup of sugar

Slice lemons and place in the bottom of a pitcher. Reserve 4-6 lemon slices for garnish. Add sugar to the pitcher. Mash lemon slices with a wooden spoon to make juice. Add wine and stir until sugar is dissolved. Serve in chilled glasses or over ice, depending on your preference. Garnish with a lemon slice.